Monday, August 18, 2008

Jumble

As I bemoaned the upcoming school year and going back to work, my father told me, "it's the first day of the rest of your life."

That popped into my head today as I travelled home from school, weary, head-achey and overwhelmed.

What on Earth did I do???

It's not that I had a bad day. In fact, as days go, it was uneventful. I was wholly unprepared, not being used to such short passing periods and teaching a different class after each short passing period. I never once felt truly in control of the classroom situation. Things weren't wild by any means, but I felt like it was a first day courtesy.

I feel, all over again, like I don't know what the hell I'm doing and I never will.

Sometimes I wonder if I am really cut out for this.

And this is all with nothing bad happening. I shudder to think of my response to truly awful day.

I missed my old classroom today. It was easy and familiar. I'm tired of being the new kid on the block. I'm tired of feeling young (and being mistaken for a student).

Not an auspicious start, but I am determined to stick it through. I just may need to give up my caffeine ban to survive.

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